


Crown

by Mez10000



Category: Super Mario & Related Fandoms, Super Mario Bros. (Video Games)
Genre: Crack Taken Seriously, M/M, Shapeshifting, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, crown mushrooms, seriously late to the party, y'all remember bowsette?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-12-09 05:04:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20989325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mez10000/pseuds/Mez10000
Summary: Waluigi receives a Crown Mushroom.





	Crown

As soon as a new thing was discovered, a thriving black market sprung up around it. Crown Mushrooms were this month’s hottest new item, and there was a thriving subculture of people willing to pay handsomely to look like a princess, albeit temporarily.

Waluigi couldn’t really understand why it held such appeal. For some, there seemed to be the thrill of being someone else during intimate liaisons. For their partner, it was likely the sordid appeal of debauching royalty. Neither of those spoke to Waluigi’s sensibilities.

So it was bewildering why Waluigi had a Crown Mushroom of his own. It wasn’t as though he had wanted it, but when you are friends with a rich game developer with a twisted sense of humour, you tend to accept all gag gifts with a grimace and not question it.

He could sell it, he supposed, but that would set the rumour mill on fire, and the last thing he wanted to do was to let Wario know his gift had been resold. He could throw it away, but it would be a waste, and besides, he just knew Wario would ask about the experience and he wasn’t that convincing a liar at the best of times.

No, he would have to try it, much as he was dreading the thought. There just was not any other way around it. But the whole concept was—

What if he never changed back and was stuck as some princess-abomination for all time?

What would it even feel like, being female? Daisy’s complaints made it sound vaguely unpleasant and quite painful.

He half wished Luigi were here - his partner was better at soothing irrational fears, or at least the ones that weren’t his own. But then that would mean Luigi would see him like that, and wouldn’t that be awkward? Or worse, what if Luigi decided he was disgusted with the change? No, it would be better if Waluigi just got this over and done with on his own and avoided anyone for the next…however long this mushroom would last.

With that in mind, Waluigi placed the Crown Mushroom atop his head and screwed his eyes shut.

The change was over in an instant. When Waluigi cautiously opened his eyes, he had a lower viewpoint - he was obviously shorter now. He looked at his hands - they were smaller, but still clad in white gloves. But his clothes felt different - more snug now. But curiously, he couldn’t feel any skirts. He glanced down, but couldn’t quite make sense of what he was seeing. Confused, he shuffled into his bedroom to check his reflection in the mirror.

He was not expecting the image that awaited him in the mirror. Nor did he expect the sound of his front door opening, startling him so much he fell to the ground with a clatter. There were only two people in the world who would visit and he did not want either of them to see him looking like this. Wario would never let him hear the end of it, but the teasing would be welcome compared to…

“H-hello?”

Of course it would be Luigi.

“I’m not here,” Waluigi moaned, wincing at how even his voice seemed transformed.

Waluigi heard the hurried footsteps getting closer, then a tiny gasp as Luigi saw him, still sprawled awkwardly on the floor.

“W-what—”

“It’s me, Eyeballs,” Waluigi muttered, looking away as he picked himself back up.

“Huh? How? Why?”

Waluigi reluctantly forced his gaze to meet his partner’s. Luigi did not seem angry or disgusted, but he was so mild-mannered that most people would never realise if he were truly upset. Yet he only seemed concerned.

“Crown mushroom. Wario,” Waluigi explained.

“Ah.”

There was an awkward pause as Luigi took in all the details. Waluigi knew what he was looking at, the image had already been seared into his own memory. He was wearing a dark velvet waistcoat with green trim, a matching bowtie and smart black pressed trousers. His face was rounded, a small button nose perched above his usual long moustache, the only real giveaway to his true identity. In short, the Crown mushroom had turned him into a formally dressed close facsimile of his own boyfriend.

“I…er…I thought those mushrooms turned people into something more like…” Luigi flapped a hand in a circle. “Like Peach.”

Usually they did, regardless of species or gender. Bowser had made those pictures abundantly widespread.

“I did, too, I don’t know why…”

But then Waluigi remembered hearing about people from other lands experimenting with the mushrooms. In Sarasaland, people became more like Daisy; in the Beanbean Kingdom, they became more like Prince Peasley. Which seemed to suggest that the individual loyalties of a person-shaped the Crown Mushroom’s effects.

Waluigi wasn’t loyal to the Mushroom Kingdom, not when it had rejected him so thoroughly. But Luigi, with his endless kindness and support…

“I think it’s because you’re the most noble person I know,” Waluigi admitted. “King of my heart, at least.”

Luigi flushed bright crimson, but he smiled wide. Waluigi could feel his own cheeks warming - except they weren’t exactly his own and wasn’t that the point? Luigi kissed him on the cheek and it felt odd not to stoop to let him.

“That’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard you say,” Luigi said softly.

Waluigi chuckled awkwardly. “Must be some of you rubbing off on me.”

Luigi hummed, winding his arms around Waluigi. It was nice to be held close, even if it was still strange to be so much shorter than usual.

“So, this isn’t weird?” Waluigi muttered into his partner’s shoulder.

“No, it’s very weird. I really wasn’t expecting…this…when I came around today…” Luigi shrugged. “But weird is relative. This doesn’t even make my top ten for the month.”

Privately, Waluigi had to agree, but then again, he had seen at least ten of the pictures of gross misuses of the Crown Mushrooms floating around the less lawful parts of the Mushroom Kingdom.

**Author's Note:**

> So this was going to be a much angstier piece about Luigi having some real issues with self-esteem having being confronted with his own image, but...I think we all need something light and fluffy in these dark times.


End file.
